friday stew: 5-spice jellyfish

i'm calling this "stew" because it's full of random ingredients.

***
there are some things worth fighting for.

there are some things that must be let go.

sometime we fight on because we're afraid to let go. sometimes we let go because we're afraid.

it's no simple task to determine the difference. it's funny how well we think we know ourselves, but even our own hearts can mislead us. only God can open the eyes of your heart to help you properly discern the difference.

***

tomorrow is the first day of spring - YIPPEE!!! i'm so excited i could burst. i'm torn though because on one hand, i want to get out and enjoy the 70+ degree sunshiny saturday.

but on the other hand, my apartment is a MESS!! due to my baby girl shifting back into a phase of not sleeping consistently through much of the night, i've been exhausted for the past several weeks, barely squeezing in 5 hours of sleep a night (with at least one or two wake-ups). so i haven't lifted a finger to clean.

i DID spend last weekend washing 4 loads of laundry - only to leave the clean clothes piled in baskets because i couldn't find the time to fold and put it all away. and when i finally did have the time, i was too tired.

but who wants to be stuck inside cleaning on the first day of spring??

***

to help celebrate spring and to celebrate Jesus's Resurrection, i bought my daughter a cute little Easter-themed flower pot. i'm going to start a plant for her that i hope will thrive and grow so that in a couple of years when she's old enough, she can take a little watering can and nurture her very own plant. it is my hope that i can tell her how her Mommy started this plant for her when she was 5 months old and how it symbolizes the planting of God-seeds in her heart that will spring up new life if watered and nurtured. I want to teach her that just as her plant needs to be fed and watered in order to grow, her spirit likewise needs to be tended to in order to flourish. and that if the seed of God's word falls on fertile soil in our hearts, it will grow and bloom.

i think it will be a fun project and i'm looking forward to starting her little plant. i can just picture her at 2 years old holding a tiny watering can with her name on it, watering her little plant :-)

***

physical therapy is like going to the spa twice a week. because of my injuries from the car accident in January, i have to go to physical therapy every tuesday and thursday for about an hour and a half each session. i adore my PT...he's awesome.

though he works me pretty hard and the therapy can be rigorous at times, it's refreshing. i get a massage twice a week at each session; i get a great workout each session -my PT makes me do a bunch of squats, and lots of other exercises to build strength in the areas in which i was injured. then at the end of each session i get "ice and stim" (short for 'stimulation') where i get to lay on a bed with electrodes hooked up to my back that send pulses to my injured muscle tissue, all while laying on a cold pad to ice my back. it's soooo relaxing and i always drift off to sleep.

***

eating vegan cookie dough is great because you don't have to worry about contracting salmonella since it contains no raw eggs!

***

being a parent, i now am beginning to understand God's love for us even more. when i look into my daughters eyes and she smiles loving at me, my heart melts and i can't squeeze her tightly enough. i think of her all day long and no matter how tired i am, i can't wait to go pick her up after work. when she gets excited as i walk into the room and call her name, my entire self lights up. she knows me and that means more to me than anyone else knowing me. when she cries, i want to do whatever i can to stop her tears. i want to hold her constantly, protect her at all costs, go out of my way to make sure she knows i'm here for her and that i love her.

how much more then, does God, my Father, love me? does He get excited when i acknowledge Him? does it warm His heart when i get excited to spend time with Him? when i tell Him i love Him and look longingly to Him, does He hold me even tighter? does He long to see me every day? does it break His heart when i get so busy that i don't make time for Him? does He miss me?

***

i have had such an insatiable sweet tooth lately. i'm so afraid that i'm going to push myself right into diabetes-ville. i could have something to do with sleep deprivation. i think i remember reading that when you lack sleep, you crave sugar more. yikes.

***

i just read an article about a type of jellyfish that is "immortal." it is the only animal able to revert back to its polyp stage - meaning it can go from full adulthood back to a baby then back to adulthood again. therefore, there really is no natural limit to its lifespan (unless some external force kills it). you know how some animals, like starfish, worms and salamanders can regenerate parts of their body (i.e. if part of its body gets cut off)? well basically this jellyfish, turritopsis nutricula, can regenerate its entire body, over and over again. it's called transdifferentiation.

i'm going to make it a point to use the word "transdifferentiation" at least once this weekend.