an unapologetic public service announcement from my Soapbox

a word of advice to men seeking women:

when you meet a woman for the first time, and you're expressing interest in her, making small talk, striking up conversation, it is probably wise to refrain from cursing while speaking to her.

here's why:

1) aside from her physical appearance, you know nothing about this woman, about her standards, what offends her or doesn't, what she likes or dislikes. so cursing in the initial conversation could potentially offend her a great deal.

2) it's just not a good look. get off the "i'm just being real, and this is what i do and who i am and if you don't like it that's your problem" ignorant bandwagon. it's not about not being true to yourself, it's about showing respect for a total stranger. you wouldn't (i would hope) walk up to someone's grandmother you're meeting for the first time and curse all throughout your conversation with her, would you? so please don't do that with me. i'm no grandmother, but my youth or proximity to your age should not automatically give you a free ticket to talk to me any kind of way.

cursing, for me, is about the equivalent of nails on a chalkboard. one or two slips can get by me without much issue, but sentences saturated with f-- this and mother- that are a surefire conversation-ender for me.

i used to curse like a sailor, in my younger days. but maturity and an ever-growing relationship with God have cleaned all of that out of me. i can't even listen to songs or watch movies that are potty mouth laden anymore - and you should have seen my former repertoire of musical tastes. some songs i used to listen to and shake my money-maker to would make a gangster blush. thank the Lord for changed hearts.

but my level of sensitivity to those things now is powerful. and a man who curses non-stop is not attractive to me in the least bit, especially when he first meets me. now granted, when a guy first meets me, he has no idea what kind of life i live, what i accept or reject, so how could he know that cursing offends me?

but that's my point exactly: you don't know. and until you have had several conversations or opportunities to interact with me to learn at least the bare minimum of what i'm all about, let's keep the cursing out of our speech, hmm? we all have our issues, our flaws, our bad habits. i'll gladly tell you mine (if you ask - hehe). but cursing is no longer one of those vices, and my system can't deal with it from others too much. it's almost like being in a room full of smokers - it's oppressive, irritating, and damaging to my health.

so to sum up: cursing in your "get at me" speech does not a phone number get. if you feel no qualms about telling me that your a** is so f-ing tired and you can't wait to go home and relax and sh**, just know that chances are great that you will never be relaxing with me. cuz something tells me that we are likely not going to be very compatible. i'm just saying...

i'm a delicate flower, with delicate flower ears. the respect is appreciated much.

muchísimas gracias :-)