Celebrate!

June is National Celibacy Awareness month - i just found that out. how awesome!!

it warmed my heart to learn that someone established such a month. this world celebrates so many other things that are not positive - it's great to know that someone stood up to initiate celebration of something so enriching, enlightening, and wonderful, and that is celibacy.

when i found out that this was celibacy awareness month, it made me reflect on how the values that were once so prominent and precious ALL OVER the world now seem almost totally defunct. whatever happened to people being virgins when they got married? it's almost unheard of nowadays. twelve year olds are having sex, most romantic couples are having sex - what happened here? whatever happened to "waiting"? does anyone do that anymore? long ago, people used to hide the fact that they were sexually active because it was taboo to do so out of marriage - so they were ashamed. somewhere down the line, that got totally reversed and now kids are ashamed to NOT be sexually active, and they hide the fact that they are virgins! when did it become a bad thing to be a virgin?? i WISH i could get mine back...(seriously)

i'm always deeply saddened and awestruck (not in a good way) when i hear of pre-teens and young teens having sex. when i was twelve, i knew of people who were "doing it" but "it" was far from my mind. never once did i wish i was having sex at twelve years old. how did that happen to our children?

as i was growing up, i was so gung-ho about waiting until marriage. part of it was because that was what i was taught that i SHOULD do. but then, even as i got older, it became part of my OWN value system, to cherish my body and respect it. plus i was deathly afraid of all the sexual consequences that could occur, as i saw several girls in my high school get pregnant before they even graduated. and i wanted more for myself.

after i finally succumbed to the curiosity and temptation, (right before my 18th birthday, if you must know), i cried for 3 days straight. even though i was in a relationship and loved (as much as i was capable of at 17) the guy i was with, i was devastated that i had thrown away something that was so precious to me. i barely let him touch me after that.

now, as an adult who is older, wiser, and now has a really deep relationship with Christ who created me, i know my worth, i know my preciousness, i know i'm worth waiting for. i'm celibate and i love it. no worries about consequences i'm not prepared to deal with (disease, pregnancy, etc.), and when i'm dating a guy, i know he cares for ME, not for my body.

when sex gets all entangled in a relationship, it's so easy to confuse lust and passion with love. but just because the sex is good, doesn't mean the relationship is. and good sex does not equal good love. i'd take good love over good sex any day. otherwise, how else will you be able to determine if someone is into you because of who you are or because of what you do for them physically? through all of my life experiences, one thing i have learned for certain is this:

i am more than a body.

there is a soul inside this body that is far more precious than any physical part of me. don't get me wrong: sex is an awesome creation from God. He made us sexual people. He gave us a desire for the opposite sex. He gave us the ability to connect with another that way. BUT He created it solely to be used within the confines of marriage (hey...it's in the Bible, i didn't make the rules). and with all the problems that sex outside of marriages has caused in this world, i can see why God gave us those boundaries. sex has ruined many lives, because it has been abused and misused. if you don't agree, look at the AIDS crisis, all the cases of chlamydia, gonorrhea, syphilis, unwed mothers and fathers, babies abandoned and left to die in garbage bins, marriages ruined, ending in divorce because of extra-marital affairs...the list goes on.

i'm worth more than some guy lusting after my body. i'm worth so much more.
so i'm celibate and proud...have been for a long time. i'm not ashamed of my celibacy. i have met a few guys who can't handle it and say "if you're not giving it up, i don't want to see you anymore." those kinds of guys don't affect me at all because anyone who would leave because i'm not having sex with them is DEFINITELY not the one the Lord has sent to/for me. i don't shed a tear for those kinds of guys - i just praise God that He showed me what kind of trash that particular guy was, and i move on.

if you've been having sex right up until your wedding night, how would it be anything different or special? how would sex with your husband or wife be any different than any other experience you've had? that's the problem...it's not supposed to be that way. it's supposed to be a beautiful, intimate experience between 2 married people, not just "sex" for the sake of just having sex, like it was with that person, and that person and that person.

i wish more of our young people had positive influences in their lives today. someone to drill into their heads that having sex does not make you a man, or a woman. having sex does not mean you are automatically loved by the person you're giving your body to. having sex is not a sport that you play as much as possible. it is ok to wait until marriage. as a matter of fact, it is great to wait. waiting is such a blessing. you're worth it. you're worth so much more :-)