G-List "celebrity" shenanigans

i'll admit, i watched "Jon & Kate Plus 8" - but only after i started hearing all the controversy surrounding their marriage. though the show had been on for quite awhile prior to that, i had never bothered to tune in until i started hearing their names relentlessly in the media.

that sparked my curiosity.

and as with many a "reality" show, i got sucked in pretty quickly.

but whatever, my point of this post isn't even about the show (not really) but more about Jon, the now divorced dad/husband from the show.

how in the world is he dating someone already??

now i cannot make any definite statements about any of it (their marriage, dissolution of marriage, and post-divorce goings-on) seeing as how i don't know any of them personally. so the only "facts" i have are the ones the media gives us (which of course can be biased).

so i guess my gripe is not just with the newly divorced Jon having a relationship so soon, but with any divorcee who finds themselves in a relationship right after a divorce.

how, exactly, does one pull that off? and who are these women and men who are so eager to date someone who JUST got divorced?

here are my reasons for my issue with this issue:

1) a divorce, no matter what the circumstances, is a HUGE and usually stressful and painful event. it's life-changing for ALL involved. no matter how commonplace divorce is nowadays, divorce is a major thing. ESPECIALLY if you've spent a great number of years with your spouse, and now it's all over (even if you've been having problems for years, the divorce is still the big "ouch"). so...doesn't that take some healing and reflection time?

how does one find the mental, physical, and emotional energy to actually start up a relationship with a new person when the ink on the divorce papers is barely dry? and why is a new relationship where your head is at anyway?

i've never been divorced. i've never been married. but i can imagine that if i were married, and then divorced, i would not be on the prowl right afterwards. even if i was approached for dating/relationship, i honestly would have to decline, even if i was lonely or longing for companionship. i really would need a while to heal from all the turmoil and change that just went on. and i in no way would be in the right mindstate to begin something new with a new person so soon afterwards. everything is still so fresh. that's not even fair to the new person.

2) what's up with people who find no issue with dating a guy or woman who JUST got divorced? or who is actually in the process of getting divorced (because many relationships that begin under those circumstances began before the judge banged his/her gavel and pronounced the divorce final).

it's just like people who date men/women who are "separated" from their spouses. i can't get with that. a marital separation is not the time for either spouse to be playing the field. it's a time for counseling, evaluating, and prayerfully healing the marriage. how can that take place if you're dating? what happens if reconciliation begins to take place at some point? now, on top of all the other issues you've had in the marriage that brought you to this point, you're introducing NEW ones - the new person/people you've dated during the separation, hurt feelings and mistrust as a result (especially if one of the spouses was dating and the other wasn't).

even if both parties have already decided that it's over and it's just not legally done yet, dating is really the last thing that should be happening at that time. your MARRIAGE is ending....! and yet you're now in the streets looking for someone else? it's that easy?

and for those who choose to date a person getting divorced or who just got divorced, who wants that kind of baggage? why not give the guy or gal some time to just process everything? there's so much that happens when a person's marriage ends. how do you just casually walk up into that situation days, weeks or months later with no scruples or concerns?