the best things about sin

i've sinned so much in my life that i can't even remember all the things i've done.

i've done things that would probably appall or shock most people.

i've done things that some people probably can't handle knowing, so i choose my audiences carefully.

my life story has me going from being very close to God, to being the epitome of a prodigal daughter, to finding my way back home again, at the beckoning of the Father.

thankfully, i'm home again, safe in my Father's arms, safe under His care, and i'll never leave again. and there are many sins of my past that if i could have it my way, i'd choose to forget.

though i know God has forgiven them all and washed me clean, and HE has forgotten my sins (according to the word of God, He remembers our sins no more once we confess them, repent of them and then He forgives us), He has not allowed me to forget them.

if i were able to forget my sins, it would make it easy for me to become haughty in my walk with Christ. but remembrance of my shame and sins of my past KEEP me humble. though i have accepted forgiveness and cleansing from my Father, and i bear no guilt in His eyes (though i'm still working on forgiving myself sometimes), i find some joy in remembering my sin because it helps me to be compassionate to the sins of others.

there isn't much that people can do to shock me. i don't feel appalled or shocked when people confess their sins, mistakes or bad choices to me. instead, i empathize and i can share the wisdom that comes from having experienced much of the same. and i can share the good news of forgiveness and the peace of God as a result. my sins have given me the gifts of understanding, patience and compassion.

my sins of the past (and present) give me a soft spot for the sins of people today. it drives me to pray for people. it drives me to want to comfort those who feel shame and guilt because of their sins. i know what that feels like.

i also know what it feels like to be forgiven. it's an awesome peace that i can't describe. but i love to tell people that no matter what they've done, God has promised in His word that He is just and faithful to forgive when we confess our sins to Him. we don't have to wear the burden of guilt and shame for the rest of our lives.

the people of this world are so broken because of their sins. if i had not experienced half of what i've been through, i doubt i'd have the same level of understanding and compassion for those who are hurting because of their sins and choices.

i have a lot of faults but being judgmental is typically not one of them. when i hear about and witness the issues that many people have, the things people do, the minute i start to feel judgment creeping up in me, i remember the things i've done.

my memory is my greatest source of humility, thanks be to God.

the other great thing about my sins is they keep me praying: praying for forgiveness, praying for mercy, praying for change, praying for the closeness of God. and praying for others who may struggle with the same issues that i have.

and remembering my sins of the past make me rejoice and praise God even more. i may not be who i ultimately want to be, but i am so thankful that i'm not who i used to be. and knowing that keeps me from giving up on people who seem like they'll never change.

some people in my life, i've been praying for for years. and i wonder if or when their hearts will ever change. but with God, nothing is impossible. no one is a lost cause.

and as long as they still have breath, i will keep praying for change. i remember when i needed to change, and God changed me. my new heart is a miracle.

i pray for the same miracle to occur in the hearts of others.