trying to catch me ridin dirtyyyy

my ex thinks he's so slick.

i just laughed remembering out convo, and how he continues to re-hash our past relationship, bringing up all kinds of subjects, arguments we had, etc. and he tries to be so slick as to find out if i was telling the truth about certain situations back then, to see if i was lying or if i ever cheated on him.

he always hated that i had male friends even though my male friendships were never inappropriate. or if we were out in public and a guy even spoke to me, suddenly that guy was someone i was involved with, in his mind. i literally couldn't take him anywhere. the jealous, insecure, paranoia was stifling and would cause fight after fight. it got to the point where i was afraid to have him come over, for fear that the phone would ring. it could be my mother on the other end, and he'd swear up and down i was talking to a guy. and we'd fight for the next 3 hrs.

we went to the gym one night and i ran into some guys i knew from school. they greeted me, one hugged me. my ex stormed away and went to play ball, leaving me standing there looking like a battered wife, trying to explain to my confused classmates what just happened. after we finished working out, we left and he ignored me the rest of the evening. dude would go from 0 to 120 in 0.004 seconds.

even now, after all of his apologies for this and regrets for that, he STILL asks me questions, grilling me about stuff from FIVE years ago, trying to see if i'll slip and give a different detail than before.

i told him point blank....dude. it's pushing 6 years since our break up. i don't owe you anything. if i ever even half-way cheated on you, i'd tell you. i have no reason to lie, especially not now. what would it profit me to lie about past cheating to someone that i've been apart from for going on 6 years, with no hope or desire for us to ever reconcile?

i thought he would strangle me through the phone when i said that i should have cheated on him because of how he treated me. that didn't go over too well.

exactly. it's so funny (but really not) how after all this time, he still doesn't trust me, and we're not even together.